a dialogue between hands-on grooms

we’re attending a wedding this coming saturday and we’re definitely gonna blog about it (as per request by the groom. 😀). what we didn’t expect was we’re gonna blog about it BEFORE the wedding. 😉

glenn posted this blog post at the weddingsatwork community board which was too good not to share and respond to. here’s his post grabbed straight out of their blog:

Confessions of a Hands-On Groom

Three days to go.

You’d think that by now, I’d start to get cold feet. On the contrary, I’m actually excited about our wedding.

Although Janice and I started preparing for our wedding day a little over 11 months ago, my own personal preparations have begun much earlier than that Sunday morning in Tagaytay. Around two months before I popped the question, I have studied the ins and outs of buying an engagement ring. Add to this the “buwelo” I had to gather before I started to make my move, I’d say I have been preparing myself for almost 2 years now.

I will never be able to recall a defining moment in our relationship when I was finally sure that Janice would be the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. It was not a divine sign, nor a dramatic moment, nor a magical night underneath the stars, that led me to this conviction. In between the fears, the tears, the uncontrollable laughter we’ve shared, it just grew, and I knew, that our happy beginning is not a question of “if” but merely a question of when. As we nurtured our relationship, I was starting to pack my bags, preparing to take the train to marital bliss.

Preparing for a wedding is an adventure. Primarily because it is always your first time, and you will never be ready for it. You simply jump into the darkness, and learn along the way.

Weddings have traditionally been the bride’s kind of thing. But having known a couple of male friends who themselves got their hands dirty with the bridal DIY glue, I was somehow encouraged that there is nothing wrong with me for being excited with all of these. I am proud to say that I am a hands-on groom. I was the one who found my bride’s make-up artist, discussed the design of our unity candles with our online vendor, surfed the net for the perfect venue for our prenuptial pictorials, and a lot more, to the point that Janice claims I have done 90% of the work.

Sure, wedding preparations are fun. But the truth is, your wedding can only be as good as the effort you put into it. The truth is, there are elements you have to let go of, ideas that will never work out the way they were conjured in your head. The truth is, two people in love will disappoint and frustrate each other, either through miscommunication or negligence. The truth is, things will never work out perfectly the way they were planned. Preparing for a wedding is a roller coaster ride. It goes ups, comes down, it goes too fast then stalls; it takes a lot of fortitude and faith to keep the wheels rolling towards that envisioned destination.

It is during the homestretch that we discovered the value of Faith in our relationship. Barely 2 weeks into the wedding day, I found myself consoling my bride who was crying over her less than perfect wedding gown. I found myself trying to reassure her that things will be okay, as long as we have faith in Him and firmly believe that He is watching over us. A week into the wedding day, I found myself, with my faith dangerously wavering, trying to convince myself that all these things are trials from God, and that we should, as the Bible puts it, be joyful for them. Last Sunday, God once again manifested his Love for us, and turned things around. Janice now can’t wait to march down the aisle with a wedding gown she loves.

Preparing for our wedding has been a long and exciting adventure for both of us. In our desire to make our dream wedding turn into reality, reality joined the fray and helped us grow together. Fate interfered and multiplied our faith a thousand fold. In preparing for our wedding together, we have now prepared ourselves for our marriage.

like i said, this post was too good not to respond to and we’d like to share our response to it.

being a hands-on groom myself, it’s such a delight to read positive thoughts from a guy’s point of view when it comes to wedding preparations.

the wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime event… the preparations included. come to think of it, preps is like a prelude to one’s marriage. to start off a journey, more so a journey of a lifetime, it’s best to begin at the right foot hence, do it together… contribute a lot.

in the process though expect a few bumps. some highs and a couple of lows. that’s all part of the experience and, the good thing, also the growth process. being actively involve in the preps not only solidify a great wedding but, more importantly and as glenn said, a great marriage. and that’s what this is all about all along.

i know this guy (i’m not sure though if i’m of those “couple of male friends” he was talking about)… and i couldn’t agree with him more. so, glenn, i know that all your effort will be rewarded by an awesome wedding and an even more awesome marriage.

my wife and i just catched the movie 27 dresses this past weekend and there’s a line there stuck with me which, somehow, i knew would come in handy one of these days. to glenn and fellow w@wies, remember this line from katherine heigl’s character as she was walking down the aisle,

“everything was perfect… and i didn’t care.”

one thing remains important in weddings… it’s the union of two people. for brides, the guy waiting for you at the end of the aisle. for grooms, the lady walking down the aisle towards you.

see you this saturday, glenn. we’re sure it will be a blast. 🙂